Believe & "The Apeirogarians"

Letter to CSA Members:

As High Fashion / Believe T-Shirt Launch Week comes to a closure on our farm, and we transition into this weeks Quintessence of Detox & Wellness (just sounds better than theme - doesnt it?), as we welcome two new CSA business drop points into our network - I wanted to sum up the week with a few thoughts.

We had alot of wonderful/amazing/mind blowing things happen here on the farm during Believe T-shirt Week - I will be putting some postings up on my blog redcloverfarms.blogspot.com later on tonight that you can read if you like - but I just wanted to send this brief email to you all. I keep on reminding myself that you folks signed up for vegetables - not a life story. I think it would be rather odd if we went into the local stoprite and the guy behind the deli counter pulled up a chair and started telling us about their kids, their woes and showed us their vacation photos - I think we would all be like "ok, here is my deli ticket number, keep the bologna - bye"! I've read enough about "lightning brains" and TBI to know the possible post-side effects of altered judgement and inhibition of behavior to make me question the "too much info" standards of society - and I sometimes wonder if I have a little bit of that going on. I have noticed that my boundaries have expanded from "thinking outside of the square box" - to" thinking outside of the hexogram and octogram". I think it is safe to say that I now am an "Outside of the Apeirogon Thinker" as I move forward. An apeirogon is a degenerate polygon with a countably infinite number of sides. It is the limit of a sequence of polygons with more and more sides. Like any polygon, it is a sequence of line segments (edges) and angles (corners). But whereas an ordinary polygon has no ends because it is a closed circuit, an apeirogon can also have no ends because you can never make the infinite number of steps needed to get to the end in either direction.

I think alot of farmers are Apeirogarians (I think I just made up a word! and a new t-shirt) - and my hunches were validated when a fellow RCF member told me about another local farmer who sends out Newsletters to his customers documenting his journey. She was kind enough to forward me a copy, and as I read all about his challenges - hiding in the woods from the bank when they were going to foreclose on his farm and things of that nature - the only thing that I kept on thinking of as I was reading it was "I get you,man". It's so strange to get to a point where you feel comfortable opening your world up to people who you dont really know - we are taught not to air our dirty laundry, and just to sweep those crumbs under the rug - and its so fearful to be judged by others with all that what will so-and-so think. Well, let me tell you - all of that goes right out of the window, along with the baby and the bathwater when you are a farmer. I have always been a very private person - and it wasnt until I picked that hoe up again 3-4 years ago that my ways of thinking changed. Add a CSA membership to that equation, well heck you are all family. It's very personal to a farmer when we are out there growing food for our community. When people join your CSA - the mass community becomes names and faces and families who you are farming for. As time goes on and you get to know each member more, you find youself in the fields thinking "oh jennifer is just going to love that tomato, or save those last berries for sue because she is making a pie this week".

As I have been firing through these last few very hard weeks of massive devastation here on the farm with only faith in my pocket (literally) - many folks, including friends and family ask me how I stay so optimistic. I just keep on telling them "Believe baby!" I think they are finally believing me this week as they witnessed all of the blessings that just found their way onto our farm. Many people are scratching their heads and are like "but how? what? no..really?" and I just say "told ya". It is just so funny because for many many many years when people asked me to explain what i meant when I talked about being connected and intune - I would tell them its like going to visit P. Sherman, 42 Wallaby Way, Sydney (it's where Nemo and Dory are heading in the movie Finding Nemo). My husband Mike, a fellow headscratcher - came up to me this week and said something along the lines of "Ok, so what is the story with the fish again?" and I started explaining and he stopped me and said "Oh, so you are just like Dory" and I said, "Oh my gosh - with my whole lightning forgetful brain, I am Dory". I'll blog later for those of you who want to read more. Until then, enjoy some of these scripts that I found of Dory - perfect example of what I have experienced since the "zap" Stay believing in everything that you do!

"Nemo's home from school!" Dory said brightly, turning to leave.

"Wait, Dory," Marlin exclaimed in shock. "What did you just say?"

Dory turned and looked at him strangely. "I said that Nemo's home."

"You remembered my son's name!"

"I remembered? I remembered!"

Marlin laughed. "Where did we go on our adventure?"

"P. Sherman, 42 Wallaby Way, Sydney," Dory replied promptly. "I remembered!"

"And why did we go there?"

"To find your son, Nemo." Dory started dancing. "I remembered again!"

"Fish are…."
"…Friends, not food. I remembered, I remembered, ooo yeah, I remembered," Dory chanted.

Marlin joined in. "You remembered, you remembered." When they stopped, he smiled. "Okay, let's go."

"Go where?" Dory asked, then exclaimed, "Ooo! There was something I had to tell you," before he could reply.

Marlin's expression turned cautious. "What?"

"Harpo's home from school!" Dory said, grinning. "Come on, Martin!" She swam out of the anemone. "Ow!"

Marlin shook his head and started to smile again. Some things would never change.